Wadi talks to media about growing up in Gaza amid wars, leaving it to follow his dream and the struggles of being a Palestinian footballer amidst the ongoing war in Gaza.
On October 7, Palestinian footballer Mahmoud Wadi was recovering from an injury in Egypt when Israel launched its war on Gaza, following the Hamas attacks on southern Israel.
The 29-year-old, from Khan Younis in southern Gaza, has spent the past five months desperately seeking news about the safety of his friends and family in the besieged enclave while travelling with the Palestinian national team.
He has lived through three Israeli military assaults on Gaza – in 2008, 2012 and 2014 – and says he remembers spending every night wondering if he would make it to dawn.
Wadi, who now lives in Cairo and plays for Arab Contractors in the Egyptian Premier League, was part of Palestine’s squad for the AFC Asian Cup 2023 in Qatar, where the team recorded a historic second-round finish.
The al-Fidayi (as the Palestinian team is known to its fans) received passionate support from the crowds of people from various countries, religions and age groups, who turned up in their tens of thousands to support the Palestinian team before their round-of-16 elimination by hosts and eventual champions Qatar.
In a conversation with media, Wadi opens up about the struggles of putting on his best performance on the field while the war rages at home.
media: Growing up in Gaza, what did football mean to you?
Wadi: Football is the only escape from war and the Israeli occupation. Young people and children turn to football as it offers distraction from the circumstances. Football makes them feel good. In Gaza, we love football. But the wars waged against us over the years, the harsh economic conditions and the siege that has completely closed Gaza and its people, preventing children from achieving their [footballing] dreams.
Wadi: To leave your country, your homeland, your family and your friends for a better future is not easy. It brings a constant feeling of alienation and loneliness. But we make sacrifices for our ambitions. We are people who love life, people who want to live like others and follow our dreams. The difficulty lies in the fact that you are leaving behind the people you love.
Now, I live abroad and my family is in Gaza exposed to the killing, destruction and displacement. I left Gaza, my family and friends to play football, but I live in fear and anxiety.
We do not leave Palestine because it is not a beautiful country. We love our land madly, but we have to search for a better life.
media: What are the struggles of being an international footballer for Palestine?
Wadi: In light of the Israeli occupation and its obstacles, it is not easy to be a footballer. It has a massive impact because you cannot gather players for football camps in Palestine.
Players from Gaza cannot enter the occupied West Bank, and vice versa. There are players outside Palestine who cannot enter, and so on. Despite the difficult circumstances, the Palestine national team gathers abroad from various places. We have players from the occupied West Bank, Gaza Strip, Palestine 48, from various Palestinian refugee camps in the occupied territories, and from the diaspora.
No team in the world can go through such conditions and participate in a prestigious regional championship [like we have]. This in itself is considered a great Palestinian achievement and source of pride.
Wadi: It is very difficult, especially when communication is cut off in Gaza. I have never left my phone since the start of the war. Be it in Egypt, while travelling with the team, or during our training sessions.
One morning, my brother disappeared. No one in my family knew anything due to a communication blackout. I felt very anxious during those 10 hours until I heard from him.
This is our situation: A constant feeling of anxiety and unimaginable conditions. It’s indescribable not knowing where your loved ones are, feeling helpless and unable to do anything. All you can do is pray. Every second of our lives is a test.
media: How do you feel after speaking to your family and friends in Gaza?
Wadi: They try to describe a small part of the reality they live through every day but it’s very difficult for them to convey their feelings. Words cannot describe the reality of the war. Our conversations are focused on the harsh and bitter conditions they face. But just like everyone else in Gaza, they remain brave.
media: What was it like to meet your family after two months?
Wadi: I met my mother, brothers, and their families in Egypt after more than 80 days of war. I had an image in my mind about the ugliness of the war, but when I looked at their weak faces, eyes, frail bodies, and white hair, it was far worse than anything I could imagine.
I have lived through three wars. It was scary spending nights waiting for bombs to drop and for the roof to crush me – but this war is not the same.
media: What is the last memory of Gaza in your mind?